"Today I choose life.
Every morning when I wake up
I can choose
joy, happiness, negativity, pain...
To feel the freedom that comes from being able to continue
to make mistakes and choices - today I choose to feel life,
not to deny my humanity
but embrace it."
- Kevyn Aucoin,
American Make-Up Artist
(Deceased) -
We just celebrated our nation's day of independence - July 4th! In my part of the county it was celebrated with cookouts, parades, and fireworks. We owe our freedom to so many soldiers who fought wars and the ones who lost their lives so that we can live ours. For this I am truly thankful.
There is another type of independence day and this is not to diminish the real meaning of July 4th, but as over 50s we have our personal independence days...and I say days
not just a day.
Especially as women over 50, we experience more than one independence day. We experience the day we are without our parents (our parents pass away and we are no longer someone's child), we experience the day we are childless (our children are grown and on their own), we experience the day when we have entered the final phase of menopause and are free from all the burden it brings, some of us experience the day we are spouseless (our husband passes away or our marriage ends), and sometimes we experience the day we become completely alone.
"The biggest change
for me as a mom
was realizing
I needed to
put someone else before me.
Now the hardest part
about the empty nest
is learning to put myself first."
- Kim Alexis,
American Model,
Age 57 -
On each independence day, we learn to live more and more on our own. As long as our parents are living, we still consider ourselves someone's child.
Women being nurturers at heart and by nature, are always dependent on her family being there. It provides her with a purpose for living. Her children need her and she needs them. Her spouse needs her and she needs him. Each time one of these connections is broken we become more and more independent.
"Death is not the
greatest loss in life.
The greatest loss is
what dies inside us
while we live."
- Norman Cousins,
American Journalist -
One of the most freeing independence days is the day we pass the final phase of menopause. No more monthly concerns, no more worries of pregnancy, we are free to be who we are sexually without any reservations. It's a two faced blessing. You can no longer bare children and that's a little sad, but you can no longer bare children and that's freedom!
It's important to keep these independence days in the back of our mind. It's important because it will remind us to live a full life. A life that is full of things that belong just to us, that we share with no one else - not our parents, not our children, not our spouses. It can be a hobby of sewing, reading, writing, painting, woodworking, crafting, jewelry, watching movies, dancing, concerts, exercising, studying the Bible, anything! Anything that fills our time that is just for us.
"Most women would not
be happy being me.
People say,
'But you're alone.'
But I don't feel alone.
I feel very un-alone."
- Stevie Nicks,
American Singer -
This is important because when those independence days come along, we will still know who we are and have things to fill the gaps. We will grieve the losses, but we won't lose who we are. We must also remain close to our spiritual beliefs. If we keep other things in our life that belong just to us, it will be easier to handle those independence days.
"Grief is in two parts.
The first is loss.
The second is
the remaking of life."
- Anne Roiphe,
American Writer
(Died at age 82) -
As we celebrate the independence of our great nation, let's remember how far we as women have come in the land of free and the home of the brave. We can do anything we want now, go anywhere we want (with or without a man), we are independent and no matter how old we are or are allowed to be, we are valuable, we are relevant, and we have a lot both to offer the world but also still to learn.
Be open to it.
As a final thought, a young actress has the right idea about true beauty. No matter what age you are this is true:
“I can’t think of any better representation of beauty
than someone who is unafraid to be herself.”
- Emma Stone,
Actress -
Have you experienced any personal independence days? Have you discovered new found freedom through menopause? Do you wake up every morning and say to yourself:
“The question isn’t
who’s going to let me;
it’s who’s going to stop me.”
Ayn Rand, Writer
XOXO
Every morning when I wake up
I can choose
joy, happiness, negativity, pain...
To feel the freedom that comes from being able to continue
to make mistakes and choices - today I choose to feel life,
not to deny my humanity
but embrace it."
- Kevyn Aucoin,
American Make-Up Artist
(Deceased) -
We just celebrated our nation's day of independence - July 4th! In my part of the county it was celebrated with cookouts, parades, and fireworks. We owe our freedom to so many soldiers who fought wars and the ones who lost their lives so that we can live ours. For this I am truly thankful.
There is another type of independence day and this is not to diminish the real meaning of July 4th, but as over 50s we have our personal independence days...and I say days
not just a day.
Especially as women over 50, we experience more than one independence day. We experience the day we are without our parents (our parents pass away and we are no longer someone's child), we experience the day we are childless (our children are grown and on their own), we experience the day when we have entered the final phase of menopause and are free from all the burden it brings, some of us experience the day we are spouseless (our husband passes away or our marriage ends), and sometimes we experience the day we become completely alone.
"The biggest change
for me as a mom
was realizing
I needed to
put someone else before me.
Now the hardest part
about the empty nest
is learning to put myself first."
- Kim Alexis,
American Model,
Age 57 -
On each independence day, we learn to live more and more on our own. As long as our parents are living, we still consider ourselves someone's child.
Women being nurturers at heart and by nature, are always dependent on her family being there. It provides her with a purpose for living. Her children need her and she needs them. Her spouse needs her and she needs him. Each time one of these connections is broken we become more and more independent.
"Death is not the
greatest loss in life.
The greatest loss is
what dies inside us
while we live."
- Norman Cousins,
American Journalist -
One of the most freeing independence days is the day we pass the final phase of menopause. No more monthly concerns, no more worries of pregnancy, we are free to be who we are sexually without any reservations. It's a two faced blessing. You can no longer bare children and that's a little sad, but you can no longer bare children and that's freedom!
It's important to keep these independence days in the back of our mind. It's important because it will remind us to live a full life. A life that is full of things that belong just to us, that we share with no one else - not our parents, not our children, not our spouses. It can be a hobby of sewing, reading, writing, painting, woodworking, crafting, jewelry, watching movies, dancing, concerts, exercising, studying the Bible, anything! Anything that fills our time that is just for us.
"Most women would not
be happy being me.
People say,
'But you're alone.'
But I don't feel alone.
I feel very un-alone."
- Stevie Nicks,
American Singer -
This is important because when those independence days come along, we will still know who we are and have things to fill the gaps. We will grieve the losses, but we won't lose who we are. We must also remain close to our spiritual beliefs. If we keep other things in our life that belong just to us, it will be easier to handle those independence days.
"Grief is in two parts.
The first is loss.
The second is
the remaking of life."
- Anne Roiphe,
American Writer
(Died at age 82) -
As we celebrate the independence of our great nation, let's remember how far we as women have come in the land of free and the home of the brave. We can do anything we want now, go anywhere we want (with or without a man), we are independent and no matter how old we are or are allowed to be, we are valuable, we are relevant, and we have a lot both to offer the world but also still to learn.
Be open to it.
As a final thought, a young actress has the right idea about true beauty. No matter what age you are this is true:
“I can’t think of any better representation of beauty
than someone who is unafraid to be herself.”
- Emma Stone,
Actress -
Have you experienced any personal independence days? Have you discovered new found freedom through menopause? Do you wake up every morning and say to yourself:
“The question isn’t
who’s going to let me;
it’s who’s going to stop me.”
Ayn Rand, Writer
XOXO
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