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Encouragement: When your mirror and your birth certificate conflict with the way you feel!

8/31/2018

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What do you do ​when you look in the mirror and the face you see is not the face you envision of yourself? How do you feel when you have a birthday and realize you have just hit another decade and it's over half way to one hundred? How do you handle life when you feel like your 30 or more years younger than you really are?

Let me tell you what I do, how I feel and how I handle it.  

First, what I do. I take better care of my skin, but realize that I am older than I was yesterday. I get as much rest and sleep as I can, knowing that my body needs to regenerate more often. I exercise, knowing that if I keep moving, I will be able to keep moving. I read my Bible, learning about God and how he has used older people in times past. I read books that help me learn more about nutrition, my body, keeping my mind young, and my body agile. I also  read just for enjoyment as a mini-vacation. This is just a sampling of what I do.

Secondly, how I feel. I feel that if I wake up in the morning, I have done more than a lot of others who don't. I feel that if I am able to walk on my own, feed myself, and tend to my own needs unassisted, I am doing better than a lot of others who can't. I feel that if I do all I can to help myself stay healthy, both mentally and physically, then I am doing all I can. The rest is up to God. He is in control of my life, I only make decisions and act based on the limited knowledge I have.

Thirdly, how do I handle it.  Poorly at times, perfectly at times. I am only human.
  Sometimes I am strong  and that aching knee doesn't matter. At other times, that aching knee makes me want to give up.

Yes, I have those feelings, too. The difference is, now I realize that if I dwell on those negative aspects of my life, they will get worse, I will feel worse, and my life will reflect how I feel - bad.

So, I have learned to train myself to feel those feelings, but don't dwell on them. If I need to, I find someone to talk about them with. If I can find an outlet some other way, such as keeping a journal or writing, then that's what I do. Exercise helps tremendously. Getting out of the house to walk can sometimes reset my mind to positive faster than anything else.

Everyone, even me - the one who encourages others, has a bad day or a bad moment when they ask themselves 'who am I kidding'. But it doesn't last long with me, I won't allow it. If you are serious about staying healthy and active for as long as you can, too, then you won't allow it either. You will fight back against those negative feelings, emotions, and thoughts.

Dwelling on the negatives will age you fast. If you push on and fill your head with more positive thoughts on aging, you actually slow it down. It's not easy. I am definitely not saying that. But the more you do it, the easier it becomes.

When you feel old, tired, or unloved...get out of the house and go for a walk, write your feelings down in a journal, read a book on some aspect of improving aging, just do something positive,

DO NOT DWELL ON THE NEGATIVE!


Do you fight the negative feelings of aging or do you find yourself dwelling on them? If you have a method of escaping them, will you share it with us? How do you handle the conflict between your mirror, your birth certificate, and how you feel?


XOXO
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SPECIAL: My blog, Me, and YOU! It's all about YOU (and a little about me)

8/24/2018

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Someone asked me the other day why I wanted to start writing a weekly blog now that I am retired. They thought I would rather be enjoying retirement and not work at all anymore. Wrong! This question prompted me to write this blog post to tell you why I do this, how I do this, and about me....but mostly about YOU!

First off - Me, I have already lived through my 50s. I am in the next phase of my life and I have learned a lot in my 60 plus years. I am not your typical 60 something woman. In fact, I have been called everything from a "Flower Child" to a "Wonder Woman". I choose to call myself a 60+ woman who wants to help other women navigate through those tough years from 50 and beyond.

When I turned 50, there were few to none websites to connect with women my age. When you hit 50, somethings seem to change overnight and others change gradually, but things do change. I wish I had someone to help me with some of those changes.

Secondly - YOU! Your children are leaving home or have already left and you have an empty nest. You are approaching retirement and you don't know what to do with yourself.

You see lines on your face that weren't there yesterday and more will be there tomorrow (if you don't do something). You have questions, but don't where to go.

As a woman approaching 50 or 60 or beyond, you don't know what to expect. The media says one thing, actual life says another. Growing older doesn't have to be a mystery, we can do this together.


Thirdly - my Blog! There are a few sites now for the 50 and over woman (and man) but when I turned 50 there were only a couple and they were not very personal. They were not all that helpful when it came down to real life.

I told myself that when I retired and could devote time to it, I would create a site that would deal with real life issues and the woman (and man) who is growing older but not up!

That's my mantra...GROW OLDER BUT NOT UP! Who says we have to act a certain age when we are that age? Who determines what that age looks like? We do.

I remember when I was growing up, my grandparents were always old. My maternal grandmother died of a heart attack in her late 50s and so did my dad's father. Yes, they had health issues, but some of it was preventable, in my opinion...not all, but some. Attitude, being one of them.

On the flip side, I had a great grandmother who lived a full active life until she finally had to slow down at the age of 99 1/2. Yes, she lived alone and walked everywhere until about six months before she passed. She was the perfect example of how to live life.

Never did I hear her say, I can't do that because I am XX years old. Or did I ever see her stop doing things, she was always a stylish dresser and used to put pretty pastel colors on the tips of her beautiful white hair to match the outfit she was wearing.

When she couldn't drive (she could, but others thought she couldn't, simply because of her age) she walked everywhere, to the store, to church, to her daughter's house. She cleaned her own house almost to the very end. I never saw her lying around in her pajamas or robe after around 9 am. And she had a great attitude about everything, even when she outlived some of her children. My great grandmother had spunk and lots of it.

​
This blog is to highlight the positives of growing older, deal with the issues of growing older, and connect with others who have ideas, suggestions, stories, etc., about their own experience growing older.

My hope is to one day have a network of women and men who can help answer each others questions. If I don't have experience in a particular issue or don't feel I know enough to help someone, I will find someone or something that does. I interview family counselors, doctors, fitness instructors, other older people, preachers, anyone that I think has the answers I need so I can give them to you.

I have been writing this blog almost three years (3rd anniversary is Oct 15, 2018). I have plans to add more features. The future is bright and I intend to follow my great grandmother's lead and live my life to the fullest for as long as I can.
“Nobody grows old merely by living a number of years.

"We grow old by deserting our ideals.
Years may wrinkle the skin, but to give up enthusiasm wrinkles the soul.”

Samuel Ullman, died at age 84
an American businessman, poet, humanitarian

My blog is here to encourage you, to educate you (and me), and inspire all of us (including myself) to try new things and be open to living.

“I don't believe one grows older.
I think that what happens early on
in life is
that at a certain age
one stands still and stagnates.”


T. S. Eliot, died at age 77
an essayist, publisher, playwright,
literary and social critic,

and one of the
twentieth century's major poets


Please! if you have an encouraging word or a comment that may help the rest of us, please make that comment below or on our FaceBook page. Let me know how you handle getting older or what you have learned as you have gotten older. Share your feelings about aging.

XOXO
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Product Review: NYX Pore Filler - A poor filler...

8/17/2018

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Never in my blogging career so far have I ever had a product that I hated to write about until now. I tried and tried to find something positive to write about the NYX Pore Filler, I ever asked one of my friends to try (I bought her a tube) and she had the same issues with as I did.

The filler is thick and chalky. It is also lumpy. Once you work it with your finger tips, it does go on rather smoothly, but as far as filling in my pores, no it didn't. Also, when I put on my foundation, it started peeling and flaking all over my face. It looked like I was shedding my skin. I tried different foundations and it did the same with all of them.

I wish I could recommend this product, but I can't. That doesn't mean it doesn't work for some women, but it definitely didn't work for me or my friend, Brenda. She did not like it at all and I was careful not to tell her how I felt about it before she tried it.

This is only my personal opinion of this product and doesn't mean that it won't work for some women.

Do you have a solution for large pores that you could share with the rest of us? Have you tried the NYX Pore Filler? If so, what was your experience?

XOXO
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Encouragement: Another milestone for me! Stationary bike - 5 minutes - tonight!

8/10/2018

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In my garage is a beautiful "new" bike that has never been ridden (well, it was new two years ago when I bought it). Anyway, it has been sitting there in my garage collecting dust.

Every time I pull into the garage I see it and I feel defeated.
When I bought it for myself a couple of years ago, I took it home and then a couple of weeks later finally got the courage to try to ride it. The first attempt, I ended up falling off the bike onto the concrete floor of my garage, avoiding hitting my hip on the hard concrete with the use of my left arm (it really hurt afterwards, too).

The second attempt at least I didn't fall, but I also couldn't even get my bad knee to make one complete revolution on the pedals. It just didn't like bending that far back. So, I decided I needed to do some more knee work before I get back on it again.

Tonight at the YMCA, after an hour of Zumba and an hour of walking, I decided to try the stationary bikes again. I had tried them before, so that I could work up to riding my own bike, and couldn't get my bad knee to make the revolution of the pedal.

I got on the bike and I was able to pedal for five minutes! I was the only one in the room, so I didn't get a picture of me actually on the bike, but trust me, I did it! I left out of that room feeling so good.

I have been working on strengthening my knee for almost three years. My left knee has arthritis in it and sometimes I hear the bone rubbing together, but it doesn't hurt. It just doesn't want to bend back like it used to. So, tonight was a beginning. Tonight was the start of me, one day, getting on my new bike and taking off like I did when I was young. I loved riding my bike.

Sometimes I see bikers flying down the road in groups, all decked out in their riding gear and I think to myself that I wish I could do that. Well, that may never happen, but at least I know it may be possible if I work at it.

If there is something you used to do that you don't anymore and you would like to do again - work up to it, but do it! At least give it a try. You may have to modify it some in order to do it, but just do it!
 

Do you like to ride bikes? Do you still ride a bike? If you don't, why not? Is it due to an injury, inactivity, or something else? Have you ever thought about doing it again? If you do ride a bike, where do you ride? Have you ever ridden in a bike race? Is there something you used to enjoy doing, but stopped? Would you like to do it again? What is it?

XOXO
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Life: Fate? Or Divine Providence? What do you believe?

8/3/2018

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Over my lifetime
I've heard arguments on both sides of this topic. Both arguments are compelling. Even as a Christian who believes in Divine providence, I also believe in fate to some extent.



Nicholas Sparks is an excellent writer and story teller. His romance novels are about more than just romance (love).

Tonight I watched "The Lucky One" with my daughter. This movie brings the question of divine providence versus fate right to the front of the line.

In case you haven't see this movie, I am going to try to explain some things without spoiling it for you. However, I will say that what happens to the young soldier in the movie is an excellent example of both fate and Divine providence at work.

For example - was it his "fate" to find the pIcture of the girl when he did? What about where he found it on the battlefield? Did the when and where save his life because when he stopped to pick it up it kept him from walking into an explosion? And then because of his choices, did Divine providence step in to get the desired outcome (find the girl in the photo) - regardless of his choices? Was it Divine providence that lead the girl down the path she took that put her in the right place, at the right time to meet this soldier?
Do you believe this soldier's choices, fate, or Divine providence lead to him find this girl and fall in love with her?

I distinguish the difference in "fate" and "Divine providence" as this - (remember, this is only my opinion. I am not teaching or preaching to you):

Fate is something that comes our way through no action of our own. For example, the wiring in the wall of a kitchen blows and your house burns down, you can no longer live in your house. You had no choice in the matter. It just happened to you.

Divine providence is what happens after we decide what path to take - rebuild on same lot or move? Once you make the choice, if it is His will for you, God steps in to orchestrate events and people to get you where he wants you.

Here are definitions of the words 'fate' and 'providence found at Dictionary. com. As you will see they are different and yet, also the same:

Dictionary.com definition of FATE [feyt]:
noun
something that unavoidably befalls a person; fortune; lot: It is always his fate to be left behind.
the universal principle or ultimate agency by which the order of things is presumably prescribed; the decreed cause of events; time: Fate decreed that they would never meet again.
that which is inevitably predetermined; destiny: Death is our ineluctable fate.

Dictionary.com definition of PROVIDENCE [prov-i-duh ns]:
noun
(often initial capital letter) the foreseeing care and guidance of God or nature over the creatures of the earth.
(initial capital letter) God, especially when conceived as omnisciently directing the universe and the affairs of humankind with wise benevolence.
a manifestation of divine care or direction.

Do you rely on or believe in fate only, (Divine) providence only, or your own choices only? Do you believe in a combination of fate, (Divine) providence, and your own choices? Are you prepared to do your part by taking responsibility for your own life?Regardless if you believe in fate, providence, or your own choices, you have to be the master of your own life. Take charge!
​

XOXO
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    My mission​

    Sharing thoughts and ideas for the woman over 50 that are helpful, fun, creative, inspiring and interesting. Over 50s who want to remain relevant, happy and loving their life.
    On fire for your own life!
    ❤ Sheryl ❤

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