It strengthens your muscles. A hurting or stiff muscle in your back or calf or nect can stop your desire in it's tracks. You need to find the best strength-training exercises for you.
It improves your mood. Being depressed and having sex don't go together. Exercise releases certain chemicals in your brain that improve your mood, your body, and feel more at ease.
You will look better. Regular exercise helps your body to improve and look better. It can bppst your self confidence which will improve your sexual health.
For women, regular physical activity might help with arousal.
Women may also benefit from Kegel exercises. They can make your pelvic floor muscles stronger.
You can identify those muscles the next time you pee by stopping in midstream. You can practice tightening and relaxing those muscles several times a day.
Men who exercise are less likely to have problems with erectile dysfunction, or ED, than men who are inactive.
Be sure to talk to your doctor before you begin any new exercise program.
2. Don't let it become boring, spice things up.
When you’ve been with the same partner for a long time, you may want to come up with ideas to add a little variety to your sex life.
The answer might be something as simple as changing the time of day you have sex. If you’re too sleepy at night, maybe sex in the morning is right for both of you.
Some other ideas to keep things interesting:
- Try different sexual positions
- Set the stage and create a romantic atmosphere; a little planning can go a long way
- Take it out of the bedroom and find a new place to make love
- Shower or take a bath with your lover
- Indulge in professional massages that will leave you both relaxed
If intercourse is not possible for you and your partner for whatever reason, think about other ways to share your affection and be intimate with one another.
The simple but intimate acts of kissing and touching should not be overlooked.
4. Sex starts when you wake up in the morning and stops when you fall asleep at night.
- Telling your partner you love and appreciate them
- Helping each other with chores so that no one is worn out from keeping up
- Spend time with each other doing fun things (dancing, watching movies together, cooking together, taking walks together, etc.)
- Dress attractively. This can still be comfortable, but just don't go around in flannel onesies all the time when you are home. Wear something nice. If you are a woman, wear pretty nighties or sexy sweats. If you are a guy, wear nice clothes that you feel sexy in and shows your woman you think enough of her to put a little effort into the way you look to her.
- Find humor in everything, make each other laugh, even when things aren't going right, try to find the humorous or sunny side of the situation.
If arthritis or ongoing pain makes sex less enjoyable, find ways to feel better. Try a new position that’s easier on your body or use pillows for support.
If you have back pain, for instance, have sex side-by-side instead of in the missionary position, which can make back pain worse.
Plan sex for a time of day when you feel your best. Ahead of time, take a warm bath or some pain medicine if you need it so that you'll be more relaxed.
6. Troubleshoot your medications
Some medications have side effects that can affect sexual desire and performance.
Some medications that can affect sex are:
Antidepressants
Antihistamines
Blood Pressure medications
Cholestoral lowering drugs
Ulcer medications
If you think a medication you are taking is interfering with your sexual health, talk to your doctor. Many times a change in medication can solve the issue.
7. If you have had surgery, take your time. Give your body time to recover. Sometimes a lack of interest is temporary and related to the medications, the anethesia, the procedure, or the pain.
8. Talk it out. Be honest with your partner, talk everything over. If you can't fix it through communication, you may want or need to seek out a professional therapist. There are religious, sex, family, and relationship therapists so find one that meets your needs.
Don't be embarrassed to seek professional help, everyone needs help from time to time and a professional will keep everything confidential.
9. STDs will affect sexual health. Older people with STDs are increasing in numbers. If you haven't been tested recently, get tested. Take the medications. Don't be afraid or ashamed, your health is more important that what someone may think of you.
One Additional thought: Our largest sex organ is our brain. (Yes, guys, it's your brain.)
If our thoughts are good, romantic, loving, trusting, with God's approval, and centered your partner and not yourself, your sex life should be outstanding, excellent, amazing, and fulfilling.
It should be an extension of the love you feel for your partner not a task, obligation, or habit.
Love and Trust....that's the key to great sex at any age.
Sex doesn't have to end at a certain age. If you take into consideration the changes that occur as we get older, sex can actually get better as you age.
Even when illness occurs, most issues associated with the illness can be dealt with and sex can continue. The key is that both partners must want the relationship to progress. If either partner doesn't want to continue with the sexual side of the relationship, then it doesn't work.
As an over 50, don't let a number define what you can and can not do. Be open to all that life has to offer. Accept those things that really aren't working and don't fret or worry over it, but also, enjoy completely those things that are working and keep the romantic fires burning.
Live a life On Fire!
If you have a situation or story that would be helpful to other over 50s, please share in the comments, if you would be willing to share. Personal experiences always help others. Remember, you can email me any questions or ideas you may have and I will be happy to respond. Email me: [email protected]
XOXO